The Native

Home is where your family is, not where you used to live. I idealize New York all the time but Des Moines is home. Golf, 740 at Houston National then 130 at Black Rock.

The Bar

Pilsner Urquell on draft. Civilization.

The Tour

KY takes us on a tour… Of the hospitals. Pictured here is the valet parking for Texas Childrens Hospital. We drive by MD Anderson, Baylor Coll Medicine, UT Medical School, St. Luke, Methodist, Texas Heart. Numerous shrines and temples to DeBakey.

The Pit

Goode and Company, brisket, Jalapeno pork sausages, and smoked ribs with side of cole slaw, beans, and cheese bread. Married men can happily do few things without guilt: eat, drink occasionally, talk a lot about stuff, and play golf.

Night Vision

People drive impressively fast on Rte 59, on of the main arteries. TX is deregulated wide open. There is also no zoning. Was that a burger place or a strip joint next to the school? Probably both. Lots of cops -could be shooting a reality show.

The Renter

Renting a minivan. That must make KY cry a little bit inside. Unfortunately, they don’t make 911′s that carry 4 golf bags.

The Fartiste

We are sitting at a watering hole at KCI. We’re duelling our iPhone farting apps. We’re a mature bunch.

Nothing says road trip like the smell of Doritos

Stopped to pee. On Missouri border. We pick up snacks. KY gets the Doritos. Its bouquet brings back other road trips from times past. Northern Missouri is known for its fireworks vendors. Chat is gossip about so and so doing this and that.

The One

We pick up Nike One Tours, the same balls that Tiger uses. We all decide it’s the ball. Music -Panama by Van Halen.

Mother Nature plays ball

MF joins us. KY texted him earlier, asking about the weather in Houston. Saturday 0 percent Sunday 10% precipitation. How’d he arrange that. MF- “Mother Nature’s my bitch.”

We’re on the way to Kansas City to hop a plane. We’re making a stop at KY’s to pick up some ProV1′s he just received in the mail.

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